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Monday, June 22, 2009

A new beginning


[Freedom.jpg]

Ive decided it was time for me to have a new beginning....I've lived thru some really rough things in my 41 years....Ive been abused physically, emotionally, mentally, and sexually all by people that I was suppose to believe in and trust...count on to be there for me and with me. It started out when I was a child and followed me thru my adult hood. Ive tried to bury it and pretend that it wasnt there but the hurt one carries when they have gone thru so much tends to poke its ugly head out alot..and causes you to start living a life where you dont trust in anyone...you feel that no one is actually able to be honest or truthful....Im a mom of 3 boys, and Ive done everything in my power to raise my boys to be good honest..loving caring men..as you know from my post...I have 2 in college (19 and 21) and one still at home (11) and I am so very proud of them and I know without a doubt that regardless of what Ive been thru in life I have been an excellent mom!!! But inside of me I have still held on to all the hurt Ive gone thru in this life. Lately Ive been thinking what if I had the ability to bounce back from whatever hardship has come my way? What if I had the ability to look at every misfortune, as an opportunity to grow into a stronger, more resilient human being? Have you ever wondered why it is that some people can bounce back so quickly from a negative life experience, while others dwell upon the negative experience for years to come? It's called the ability to be resilient.
Resiliency is defined as the following:
1. Springing back; rebounding.
2. Returning to the original form or position after being bent, compressed, or stretched.
3. Recovering readily from illness, depression, adversity, or the like; buoyant.

After years of living life trying to just find some sort of happiness out there. I have felt that I have always given so much of myself to others only to be let down and crushed in so many ways by those people. I have done lots of thinking and I have decided that each and every person does have the ability to live a resilient life. You can be positive, proactive, healthy, happy and live a life with positive meaning, it is now my mission to learn as much as I can about how to live my life to the fullest and in the most resilient manner possible. Im only given one life...and its going to be way too short to sit around and worry about the negative that others want to try to inflict upon me. They can only hurt me if I allow them to hurt me...and guess what Im done allowing that to happen....this is my life and Im ready to start living it!!!!!


9 comments:

Lady of Perpetual Chaos said...

Go for it! You deserve the best life possible! And you really do seem like one fantastic mom.

RileyScott said...

I have similar abuse in my past that I still struggle with. I wish you the best going forward that you'll be able to erase the scars that abuse leaves on it's victim.

I for one do not think that I will ever truly be able to let go of my demons, but that does not stop me from hoping that I am wrong

Alicia @ boylerpf said...

Way to go, Dena! The first step is to understand that you have to let go. It will only eat at you and make for even more misery. Easier said than done, but still a necessity to go forward and totally enjoy yourself. You'll do it...you're a great Mom and will draw the best people towards you.

Samsmama said...

So sorry to hear all you've been through. Congratulations for taking life by the reigns and deciding to be in control. I wish you much luck, love, and happiness!

Missy said...

Sorry to hear that life has been less than fair, but glad to hear that you are going to live your life to the fullest! Very powerful post!

Homer and Queen said...

I just live in denial...

Sally's World said...

this is so inspirational Dena, i'm sorry to hear that life has been hard, but amazed that your attitude is strong through it, I am in awe of you honey!!!

from my heart i wish you all the happiness you truly deserve xxxx

Izzy said...

sending you a great big cyber hug...

Momza said...

Best Book I can recommend:
Forgiving Ourselves by Wendy Ulrich.

It's about Forgiveness...ourselves and others. I found it to be very healing...I too have been thru my own trials and this was a gift to me.

May the rest of your journey be filled with peace.